I was having a horrible time on my last bike ride. The same hills I typically ride seemed particularly steep. I even hated the bike, a new one, and it apparently didn’t like to climb. Every pedal stroke was “this sucks”.
Then I moved my seat 2cm, less than an inch. And suddenly the bike was wonderful. Turns out the new bike position was wrong, putting too much strain on certain muscles and not enough on others. I moved my perspective one inch, and it gave me a new context — from “sucky” to “joy”. It’s the same emotional transformation that occurs when changing the station after Justin Bieber comes on.
It reminded me that plenty of life’s challenges come not from the situation, but from my context.
“Context” is what we are bringing to the situation, as opposed to what the situation is bringing to us.
If there is a disagreement with colleagues in a conference room, my context can be “my colleagues are out to get me” or “working together to get the best answer”. If I’m listening to my wife, my context can be “I’m bored” or “demonstrate love through listening”. These are things that are entirely in my control, in the moment, and relatively easy to change. Easier to change than my personality, my skill set, or the other people. As easy as moving one inch. My negative emotions come from my wrong perspective.
What’s your context when things suck? Do you question it in the moment? Do you change it? How?
Sean Foote's Blog 